UNDERSTANDING AUTISM Part 4

Autism and the family

Autism is a family condition. When there is one child in the family with autism there is a condition present that affects every single-family member including those who do not live in the same home. On receiving a diagnosis of autism parents sometimes feel a certain relief, now knowing that it isn't their fault the child is different. Others react with anger, grief, shame, denial or rage. Sometimes they become angry with the diagnostician and refuse to believe the findings. Although diagnosis at an early age is a good predictor of successful outcome if appropriate treatment is provided, it is always accompanied by considerable trauma to family life. The impact of the diagnosis is always greatest on the mother.

The impact of living with a person on the spectrum has been shown to be harder on the mother than the father. The lessened paternal impact has a lot to do with factors associated with the gender role of the man in the traditional family: out of the home and working much of the time. Mothers are left in the major caretaker role and face the day-to-day stress of rearing a child with autism. For fathers the major impact of autism in the family is associated with the stress it puts on the mother. Figures in the US seem to indicate that the divorce rate in families of children with autism is not higher than in other families. This is something that has not been studied extensively in other countries however one study conducted in the UK indicates that the lone parent rate in families with autism is 17%, compared with 10% in other families.

Studies have shown that the emotional impact of autism on the mother can be quite severe. Many mothers experience enough emotional distress to require medication or psychotherapy. One study showed that 50% of mothers of children with autism screed positively for significant psychological distress and that this was associated with low levels of family support and brining up a child with challenging behavior. Another study raised this figure to 66%. The emotional stress on the mother appears to have a significant effect on the work status. Many cannot work outside the home. For those that manage to work outside the home there is an increased incidence of tardiness, missed days and reduction to part-time status. Mothers are also the person most likely to be held responsible for their child's behavior by others outside the family including neighbors and teachers. Mothers tend to cope differently with these stresses than fathers. Fathers tend to hide their feelings and suppress them, the result often being increased episodes of anger outburst. Mothers tend to cope by talking about their difficulties with friends, particularly other mothers of children with autism. They also cope by becoming avid information seekers, often knowing more about autism then the educators of their children.

The impact of autism on the siblings is not to be underestimated. They know from an early age that their brother or sister is "different". They will have a great many questions but most often don't ask them for fear of hurting the parent's feelings. They will have a deep love of the sibling with autism but this love is sometimes associated with anger and resentment due to the increased time the parents spend on the sibling with autism. They will often worry about their own future and obsess about whether or not they will "get" autism or will they pass it on to their own children one day.

The impact is not always negative and several studies have shown that being a sibling of a child with autism is associated with greater self-confidence and social competence. Care-taking skills often improve as well. Levels of tolerance to difference can be higher than in the siblings of children who do not have autism. So, what do we know about the impact of autism on the family? It is a mixed bag of results. At times is can be devastating, at other times it can lead to higher levels of coping skills and a sense of self-mastery. A lot depends on the family itself and the community in which it is embedded. A lot more depends on the supports and treatments available, especially the educational interventions and supports that can be provided. One this is certain: autism is a family condition affecting everyone.

This is the fourth article out of four articles by:

David J. Carey, Psy.D.
297 Beechwood Court Stillorgan Dublin, Ireland
http://www.davidjcarey.com

Article source: EzineArticles.com - WHAT IS AUTISM?